Cheating…Cheater and Cheatee Guide

English: Woman, broken heart.

English: Woman, broken heart. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

First, before we get to the “how-to get out of trouble” lesson I want you to ask yourself.  If your going to be in a relationship then be in a relationship.  If your going to mess around while your with someone you could end up really hurting them.  Not only that but now you get the reputation as a player and a cheater.  Once your flagged consider yourself dateless for quite some time.  It is a very very good idea to not cheat plain and simple.

 

You cheated on your girlfriend

–  Sometimes your drunk and you make-out with a girl.  This is not that terrible although it is still cheating.  Furthermore, alcohol is NO EXCUSE to cheat on anyone.

– If any of my viewers have ever noticed… when a guy tells a girl he cheated they usually want to know if he has feelings for this new girl.  However if a guy gets cheated on they usually want to know what they did sexually…

Step one:  Amplify her feelings

Tell her straight up that you messed up and had no intention of hurting her.  Tell her that you have absolutely no feelings for this girl and even go as far to say cheating made me realize what I had and I really do not want to lose you.  Trust me these work.  Your going to be annoyed for the next couple of months (depending on the severity of the adultery) by her because women, unfortunately, take time to get over things.  Give her as long as she needs and you better be there for her every time.  Do not be selfish.. put yourself in her shoes.  What if you got cheated on ?

Your Girlfriend Cheated On You

I know this is probably not going to brighten your day but you absolutely need to break-up with her immediately.  This is one of my personal boundaries.  You need to think of cheating as a way to filter out girls that are not for you.  You deserve better than a cheating chick..

Story:

My high-school sweet-heart made me regret ever taking back someone who cheated on you.  I loved her so much that I didn’t want to lose her.  I just forgave her and basically sent the message that it was okay for her to do what she did.  She ended up breaking up with me anyway because saying that the reason she cheated was because of me.  I was crushed.  I learned my lesson that day.

 

You see women cheat because they become un-attracted to you.  When they see you crying all the time when you took them back after they cheated they become even more un-attracted to you.  By breaking up with them it sets up a much better scenario for you and puts you in control.  You can play hard to get so badly that she turns into your personal slave…  but remember you have to act cool calm and collective.  If you ignore her she will probably make fun of you for being immature.  You need to resist this, it might piss you off but you must send the message that you will not be talked to like that.

 

So remember boys DO NOT CHEAT.  It’s not worth it.

-Aidan

 

 

 

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How To Get Your Ex-girlfriend Back P2

Trust me When I Say:  It is good to let it out.  Mature Masculine Men know when to cry, when to laugh, and when to love.  Talk to a friend, or listen to music that speaks to you.  This song speaks to me… Your not alone, I promise. 

Hello, welcome to relationshiphelpformen.com.  Today we are going to go a little more in depth on the topic of  “How To Get Your Ex-girlfriend Back”, a topic that I consider to be my expertise.  Getting your ex-girlfriend back, however, is not the only thing I am concerned with.  One of the attributes I want you to gain and take advantage of during this break-up period is the feeling of what it is like to be independent.  If you learn to be strong over this period there will be no break-up in the future that will “bring you down”.  Of course there will always be sadness in any break-ups you have had; learning how to be independent  will give you resilience.  Your life will not completely shut down, just because of a broken heart (much like a lot of people). This has personally been one of the hardest times in my life.  When I was in 10th grade I met the most beautiful girl and immediately fell for her.  We ended up dating all the way until my senior year(she left me for someone else).  I was crushed.  During high school I was a little bit weird.  I played trombone (concert, jazz), played in football, wrestling, and track, and was a 4.0 student.  My senior year was the worst year of my entire life.  I prayed everyday for graduation because I couldn’t focus anymore.  I went from being 12th in my class to 25th… my grades suffered, I quit every sport.  It was terrible.  However, I took advantage of this experience and learned how to be stronger.  After high school I attended Lehigh University and was back to the me I remembered.  [Moral of the Story]As you can see break-ups can destroy people’s lives IF THEY LET THAT HAPPEN.

Today I am going to go a little more in depth on the first part of the break-up: what to do first, how to deal with it.  You see, immediately after the break-up you have begun to “get her back”.  This is all about how you behave boys.  Remember women want a mentally strong man to take care of their animal instinct issues.  If she breaks up with you hard (you know what I mean) cut off all contact.

Remove her from every social networking site, email, instant messaging, skype… anything.  Only exception is facebook.  If she blocks you that’s fine too.. trust me she is going to be looking at your facebook.

Write her number down somewhere and completely forget about it.  Then delete her number from your phone.  If you have memorized this number that is okay, still delete her number from your phone.

You MUST RESIST the urge to call her, text her, go to her work, anything.  You absolutely must follow the “No Contact” Rule.  I recommend to most people that all they have to do is follow this rule and usually I’m right!   By not contacting her you are showing her that you are okay with the break-up.  You are making her think “Well maybe he got a new girl”  (This could take up to 3 weeks of no contact).  Once she reaches this point of jealous thinking she will begin to feel lonely.  She will want to talk to you in the worst way.  This is when she will likely look at your facebook because she is wondering what your doing without her.  Women actually believe (and want) that you should be crying for days, they want you to be miserable as sad as it is.  When your not showing that your upset, and express that your moving on just fine from the break-up they usually feel a rush of attraction towards you again.  Which is why she broke-up with you to begin with.  Other reasons she might break-up with you : cheating, controlling behavior, yelling at her which we will talk about later.

Now, what NOT to do with your facebook account in a nut shell.

– Don’t be a prick

–  Do not purposely come up with these status’s about how many girls your with, partying, how many girls your banging.  We just want to make her jealous, not extremely pissed that your having sex with millions of girls.

–  Now it is completely appropriate and required of you to flirt with other women.  Flirt in real life, and on facebook.  It will boost your self-confidence.  Just act friendly, do not blatantly act like your TRYING to make your ex jealous.  Just act as if she is a friend.

–  NO SAD STATUS’S.. PERIOD

–  You need to appear that you are okay.  To do this you just post status’s of you having normal fun (not so much partying, or having sex, or doing drugs).  A good way to make her jealous is to go out to breakfast with 3 girls and one other dude.  Post who your with and where your going and your SOLID.  Your implying them as friends so when she eventually calls you and asks what you were doing you just say “they are just friends”.  She doesn’t control you, you can do whatever the heck you want to.

The Next step is previously listed in the How To Get Your Ex Back category.  Follow this guide http://relationshiphelpformen.com/2012/05/25/how-to-get-your-ex-girlfriend-back/

What If She Does Not Contact You? 

This is not very common but if you have to contact your girlfriend first here is what you have to do.

Step 1:  Call her, Write her a letter, contact her.

Step 2: After you have reached her, just act cool, calm, and completely okay with the break-up.  I think you should even go as far as to tell her that.  “I think this break-up was for the best, but I don’t want to lose you as a friend.  We used to be good friends, and I want to remain on good terms with you.”  You don’t have to say this exactly but you get the idea.

Step 3:  If you talked to her in a friendly manner and no sexual intentions were implied then you can now successfully swoop in under her scope as a “friend”.

The Finish Line. 

Now after you have followed http://relationshiphelpformen.com/2012/05/25/how-to-get-your-ex-girlfriend-back/ you can just be chill.  Remain cool, calm , and collective at all times.  Let her do all the work.. let her chase you.  Your in control now.  If she doesn’t call you be patient.  Women don’t want to seem desperate by calling you back the next day.. Everything should be okay if you have followed the rules and steps I have outlined.   Good luck to you, I know you can do it.  Remember You Are A Dominant Man.. make her feel like a women.

 

– Aidan

 

 

I Don’t Care What women say…

I don’t really care what women say; naturally, they will always want to be lead by a man who makes them feel feminine.  You need to act in a way that makes your girlfriend feel feminine .

How do you do that Aidan?

Well boys and girls it’s quite simple.  Act in an “attractive manner”.  I bet you ten million dollars most guys have no idea how to treat women or behave around them. To act attractively is quite simple.

There are a total of 5 attractive traits that women, unsuspectingly to their conscious thinking, are indeed attracted to.  They are as follows:

  1. Make up your damn mind!

– Be decisive.  Knowing what you want to do with your life and going toward those goals is a turn on to women.   Take the lead in your relationship and actively take the lead.  For example, when your girlfriend asks you what do you want to do tonight you should respond with something, anything.  Lead your girlfriend.

2. Self- control

–  Maturity = Masculinity .  Maturity is all about being responsible.  In order to master this trait one must first control anger and be spontaneous or happy when dealing with life.

3. Be Assertive!

–  Your opinion is powerful, do not change your opinions to fit in with the crowd.  Believe in yourself and do not waver.  Let go of the fear of being judged by your girlfriend and speak your mind more.  Know where you stand in a conversation or on an issue but don’t be a dick about it.  Instead of looking to your girlfriend for approval (which is unattractive)  have some self validation.

4.  Modesty

– Easy way to be modest without really trying that hard is simple; do not brag about anything.  Know that you look good, know that your going to be successful, know that your girlfriend is wrapped around your finger BUT do not talk about it.  If someone compliments you just simply say thank you.  Women are attracted to the men that refuse to let others put them on a pedestal.  Remember do not brag.

5.  Ambition

–  Ever seen those axe commercials where the women jump on the male with the best scent?  That’s what ambition does to women.  Make your goals known to your significant other.  Figure out what you are passionate about in life and share it with the world (without bragging).  Trust me your girlfriend will be extremely attracted to you.

All my work so far flows together.  Like the organs in your body you cannot live without anyone of them, they work as a team to sustain your life.  These attributes put together is like sweet music floating in the air.  Your life will start to change..

Thanks for reading

-Aidan

Entering Into A Long Term Relationship [Boundaries are key]

If your looking for a successful relationship your already in the red zone.  It sounds counter intuitive, however, do not search; let that person find you.  All searching will do for you is let you find disappointment and no one likes that of course.  Instead of searching you need to first ask yourself a couple questions and then you will be able to sort through all of the women you meet.

1.) First question to ask yourself: What are qualities in a girl that you like/want to find..

My list would look something like this:

  • Funny
  • Likes to just go out and have a good time
  • Party girl
  • Down to earth
  • Layed back
  • Non-cheater
  • A person that is true to themselves

2.) Second question to ask yourself: Why are you searching for these qualities

My answer: I search for these qualities because this is how I am in a relationship, I am a chill boyfriend, almost care-free

3.) What are your fears of being in a relationship?

My answer: Being cheated on and being deceived

Okay so you have your list of what you want, now let that person come to you.  After they do come to you, all you have to do is act in an attractive manner.  To act in an attractive manner (we will get to these traits later) is quite simple.  Study the “Insecurity” category to know exactly what turns off women first.

How to transition into a relationship: Let the women decide that.  Trust me she will find a way.. and if your not that kind of type then go on a few dates and then just ask.. if she is willing to date you odds are she is willing to become your special someone.

After you have successfully entered the relationship you need to create solid boundaries and talk to her about them.  Write a list of boundaries (things that you will not put with.)

My list looks like this:

  • Lying to me
  • Cheating
  • Treating me with disrespect
  • Playing head games

Once your girlfriend knows exactly what you do not put up with in a relationship is when you have a successful foundation to your relationship.

These boundaries are not of the controlling nature (tell her that), because a controlling boyfriend is very unattractive. She must know that she is free to cross them and trust me she will at one point in time in the relationship.  Women love to test us men.  It’s not their fault however, like i said women are attracted to behavior because their animal instinct tells them that a man that is strong emotionally is a good father.. this is why they test us.  You must guard these boundaries with punishments (read the punishment section).  Women want a man with strong boundaries, if you let her cross them freely she will lose respect for you and ultimately end up breaking up with you.

Any further questions comment this post with your email and i will email you shortly.

Thanks for reading (:

-Aidan

Conflict Resolution: Be Gentle but FIRM! [punishing your girlfriend]

This post is for the times when a girlfriend starts to cross your boundaries (we will touch on this topic Sunday).  When a girlfriend tries to cross your boundaries she is disrespecting you.  Now, disrespect can mean a multitude of things (whatever that means to you).

Remember that your approval is just as powerful as your disapproval!

For little things I like to address the conflict in the following manner:

” You know, one of the things I love about you is that you are always such a sweet,

heartfelt person but as of late you have been pretty rude and disrespectful.  I didn’t

expect this out of you.”

Business of Punishment

Business of Punishment (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Clean it up whatever way you like, add in other words, slang and blah blah blah.  This usually works, you will get an apology 99% of the time.

In short: You are being kind yet firm at the same time not rude in any way but dealing with the situation in a mature manner.

  1. In a relaxed and calm tone tell her what you like or admire about her
  2. Then tell her what actions/behaviors you do not like that you do not approve of (your approval is powerful)

**There will be another post tomorrow about entering a relationship before we continue on punishment***

-Aidan

How to apologize while keeping your dignity

Tell me if this sounds familiar:  Friday morning your boy calls you and says, ” yo man let’s hangout at the pub tonight.”  You reply with “HELL YEAH!!!”.  So now it’s Friday night your a little drunk with your buddies and your phone rings.  It’s your girlfriend.. you forgot plans you made with her just the day before.  This is where a Twix bar would really come in handy.. but with my help you don’t need time to think you just do.

First off.  Never apologize for your actions. 

Bad: “I’m so so so sorry i forgot plans with you tonight please forgive me, OH COME ON it was a mistake.”  This is a terrible way to go because your reminding her what you did and two your getting mad because she isn’t forgiving you.

Good: “O my gosh I’m so sorry, It really wasn’t my intention to make you feel like i was ditching you or something. (Disqualify yourself) Ugh I can’t believe I would forget about plans with my own girlfriend, unbelievable. I’m coming over now so we can talk, I’ll call you when i get there (hangup).”  Why is this good?  In this situation it is okay to put her needs before yours however ONLY in this instance where you royally mess up.  Notice how i didn’t really focus on what this person did, I used language that conveyed that i understood the FEELINGS she was feeling at the time.  Remember women are emotional creatures, focusing on emotions any time you feel tension in your relationship is the number one way to deal with your woman or any woman for that matter.  Secondly, you said “here I’ll come over so we can talk”.  You are showing two traits right now that are very important.  One: self confidence (you have the balls to own up to your mistake and fix it) and two: you are not asking for her approval.  Notice I didn’t say “can i come over so we can talk about it?”.  You are a man who knows what to do, a man who doesn’t need his girlfriends approval on anything(very important), but above all you need to stay calm, collective, and self-controlled when dealing with any kind of situation where you feel tension so hot in the air you could cut it with a knife..

**if you have any questions about specific fights comment below with your email and i will assist you***

So what have we learned today?  One, focus on her feelings.  Two, do not ask for approval.  Three, keep your cool at all times.

My name is Aidan Stone and you have just been SCHOOLED (:

Rules for arguing with women

Question to all bloggers and viewers… have you personally, as a man, ever won an argument with a women?

If your answer is yes, your lying your ass off.  Come on now.  When is the last time you have ever heard of a man winning an argument with his women?  Almost Never!  One of the main reasons is because when men argue their heart rate builds, veins pop out, and they go ballistic on their girl making it so easy for their women to make you look terrible.  An attractive trait; self control.  Having control over your emotions is key when battling with women.  Which brings me to rule number one.

Yes, it is literally that simple.  Raising your voice, throwing shit, breaking shit is a no no.  It will only show that you have no self control and ultimately give her the avenue to make you look terrible.  If it is something stupid; treat it as something stupid.  Look at her with a crazy stare like “is she really babbling about this?”(pretend she is a quacking duck or another funny face).  If it is something really really really stupid: Tell her you find her unattractive at the moment, because she is babbling about the silliest thing.  She will likely stop acting crazy because women are all about self-appearance (hair, make-up, etc.).  Telling her that her behavior is unattractive to you will shut her down speechless, however, if there is really something bothering her then let her vent.  But make sure it is known that you want to conduct this talk in a mature manner with no crazy yelling or things along the like involved.

  • Rule #2 If you lose your self-control SHE AUTOMATICALLY WINS

You absolutely need to control your emotions when dealing with women.  Act cool and calm at all times.  Women are emotional creatures and have  a much easier time arguing in a heightened stance (when the shit hits the fan).

  • Rule #3 Be open minded

If your girlfriend (or any women for that matter) has a really good point, do not deny or act stubborn just because you do not want to be wrong.  Be a man and admit your faults, it takes a true person to admit when they are wrong and ultimately shows character.

  • Rule #4 Focus on her emotions when arguing                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           Emphasize her emotions, the way she is feeling.  Men naturally want to fix the situation because face it that’s how we are.  We see a problem, fix it.  WRONG (with dealing women anyway).  Say something like “I totally understand why your feeling that way” and continue from there.  You barely have to fix anything!  Just talk about how she is feeling at the moment.

– Aidan

***next topic: how to apologize while being a self respectable man***